Wednesday, April 24, 2013

101-2 英文讀書心得徵文比賽第二名 : 應外四 張O文


Nineteen Minutes

by Jodi Picoult


What leads a tender-hearted juvenile to the road of slaughter? Desperation.


Peter and Josie were once close friends. As time went by, they separated apart. Peter suffers severe bullying in school while Josie tries hard to merge into those bullies to make herself popular in school. Mourning over Peter’s dead brother who was a straight A student and athlete, Peter’s parents spend little time on their remaining son, which makes Peter isolated not from school, but also from family. One ordinary day, the accumulated burden caused by bullying, humiliation and violence disables Peter from enduring. Peter pulls the trigger, taking his revenge on everyone in campus with nineteen minutes.

The first time I heard about the story of nineteen minutes, I was strongly convinced that the shooter must have possessed a cold-blooded heart. The death penalty would be the only appropriate solution to his murder. However, I turned out to be sympathetic over his life after reading. I even inwardly imagined he could be acquitted of all the charges and moved on with his new life in the end of the story. Jodi Picoult is an undoubtedly inspiring story-teller. She knows what the readers look for from her story and she meets their expectations. She also casts out questions about moral issues and humanity flaws, which allows people to reflect on themselves and also the society. 

The first disputable issue that hits me is how to define “evil.” When people commit a crime, we consider them villains. When good people commit a crime, doubts arise. Deliberately shooting people to death seems to be an evil deed, but after knowing how much Peter has suffered, can we conclude that Peter is evil? Those smart and athletic cool kids win honor for school but embarrass other slow students for fun. Can we judge they are evil? Josie, once peter’s best friend, humiliates Peter in order to merge into the cool kids. She traumatizes Peter the most, but she keeps feeling guilty for what she has done. How can we define her and the parents, teachers, and anyone who neglect the victims’ crying for help and unintentionally assist with bullying? Evil is never born, but made. Goodness exists in people’s nature. Once attacked by extreme force, it gets twisted, then producing evilness. Evil could not only be an instant thought, but also be expanded to devour the man’s original nature. Peter was previously a gentle kid, who would never be the ingredient for a murderer. “Everyone’s saying I ruined their lives but no one seemed to care when my life was being ruined.” The explosive desperation toward life ultimately twists Peter into a monster with eyes glued to revenge. The pursuit of peel acceptance devours the original nature Josie used to have and twists her into a traitor to real friends. Overdosed vanity and pride twists kids into devils without empathy. Selfishness and reluctance to face the reality creates the indifferent world.

The society encourages people to bravely express their uniqueness, but once refused, people put on camouflage to hide who they truly are, and to better fit into the world. Peter’s softness does not cater to worldly expectation of being a man, and therefore he chooses not to reveal himself, laying low, being invisible in order to escape away from peel’s denial. Josie’s kindness does not qualify her for being a member of the cool kids, so she veils herself with abandoning Peter when he seeks help. The society has been so deformed that one’s merit turns out to be a demerit. Fearing for being excluded, people have to coat themselves with camouflage to survive this cruel and merciless world. Sarcastically, the education has been preaching people to retain the true colors of themselves but forgot to light directions to the outsiders who are constantly told “NO” by others in their environments, by bullies on campus, by parents at home. How to strike a balance between staying in the nature and fitting in the society still leaves uncertainty

Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves.  Confucius

When the desperation drags Peter down to the bottom, he drowns himself in the attempts at revenge. Serving as a hypnotizer, revenge entitles Peter strength and confidence to overthrow the current society. The power revenge gives off is so devastating that Peter can transform himself into an aggressive, cynical bomber, that the bullies who used to tease on Peter taste the horror of desperation for the first time, and that all the people who always ignored Peter eventually pay attention to him. The effects revenge brings are simultaneously enormous that it rings the warning bell to the world, that Peter ultimately proves his self-existence to the world, and that Peter becomes the person that everyone wants to be, a person who cannot be judged by the world. However, the Author, Jodi Picoult, does not advocate revenge but tries to hold back this attempt. Retaliation serves as a two-sided sword. It stabs the enemy deeply, and cuts the holder back even deeper. Peter wins temporary satisfaction in nineteen minutes, but the vacancy remains forever. He never has a chance to breathe the air of freedom ever again. He will never see whether there would be a turning point in his life where outsiders are welcome, or a place like Utopia where loneliness can be erased with acceptance. He can never discover all the potential possibilities in life, either.

All hatred leads to dead ends; all revenge ends in tragedy. If Peter had not sowed the seed of spite in his heart, he might have still encountered the same difficulties but faced them with positive attitudes. If Peter did not pull the trigger, he may still suffer depressing challenges, but life would be worth anticipating.
    
I have been enlightened throughout savoring every written word in Nineteen Minutes. People and the society are inseparable. The society molds personality; personality creates the society. Contrariwise, the society suppresses personality; personality explodes it. Jodi Picoult never sets a standardized answer to the above issues. She leaves space for us to reflect on ourselves, refit the society and renew the world.  

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